i got some bad news at school this past week. my principal told me that my district is eliminating my second position due to budget cuts and leadership changes. i kind of knew it was coming. my previous superintendent was progressive in a lot of ways, and she supported my goals within the district and encouraged me to further my education. however, i knew this was rare. so as soon as she was gone, i knew i was toast.
i know it’s not because of me, but it still hurts. i’ve never been fired, but that’s what it felt like. at first, i was really embarrassed. i haven’t really told many people. i thought – if i had done a better job, they would have kept it as part of the budget. i know that’s not the case, but i don’t have a good explanation besides money concerns.
i don’t feel like i even got started with my position. i had so many more things to do. it’s not like i don’t have a job anymore. i’m just going to be a “regular teacher” again, which is fine if that’s what you want. but i liked having some leadership opportunities and helping other teachers. i think it made me better too because i had to be an example. i’ve worked for several years to get to where i am and now i’m being knocked down and am basically having to start over.
but that’s just how it goes sometimes…
in education, people come and go all the time. the ripples that follow are just something you’re going to have to deal with. sometimes it’s positive and sometimes it’s negative. the good thing about it is that nothing stays the same ever. it’s constantly changing and that’s what makes it exciting.
i’ll be fine. i’m just sad. i’ll get over it and move on. things change, and i’ll just have to roll with the punches. it’ll be an adjustment though. i’ll have to accept that i’m not in a position of leadership anymore, but i will still be able to help around the school in different ways. with less responsibilties, i’ll have even more time to focus on my own classroom and being the best i can be. and i’m sure with time, other opportunities will come along that will be different but better in their own way.